Well damn everything to hell. You choose. I choose Aaron Murray. But really I dont have to choose because he's already chosen because he's going to die at 55 of either early Alzheimer's or a self inflicted gunshot wound. Look. I'm not being nasty, I'm just stating facts. Everyone you see on that field today has a shorter life expectancy than you. Yeah you. You who chug alcohol, smoke cigarettes, do various drugs, make sex to various copatriots. You will live a longer life because you don't go toe to toe with Mack trucks every day. Again, I'm not being rude, this is a statement of facts. If you blocked out one day a week and just sat in a car while it was a crash test dummy for g-d damn Nissan Versa don't you think you'd die earlier? My point exactly.
What I'm getting to is that I'd highly inebriated and done with college football. I tried to break my phone today. I really did. I threw it against three walls, I threw it on my table, I threw it against the beautiful wood trim of my couch. nothing broke it. I then decided, f-ck it all, and took dishes out of my cupboard and went upstairs and threw them off my balcony shouting "f-ck you Death, my B-tch lover." So what if I dont have enough cups for a pleasant dinner party for 8. At least I vented.
Look, all I have to say is that the season is over. Mettendouche is going to throw for 40 touchdowns since the SEC gave up playing defense for lent and the rest of the offense will do the same. All we will be left with is the gaping hole that is left when massively great expectations are certainly crushed.
Aaron Murray, go to hell. And the rest of Georgia, you can go to hell with him.
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